so i have six more weeks of ....this
i was feeling lonely, but maureen reassured me that i don't need anyone to make me happy. i had a long chat with matt yesterday. it was nice. he's now a born again christian but he didn't try to cram anything down my throat. and i really did take what he said to heart. and i know he might think i pass off what he said about how he prays for me every night, but knowing that someone out there cares about me like that really makes me want to stop all my bitching about men and all those troubles.
on the i'm gettin the fluck out of here front, i've now got two models for my portfolio shoots and the first one's comin up real soon! i'm really proud of the woman and artist i've become. not in the sense that i'm like nah nah i'm better than you, but just that i'm happy with what is born from my hands and my mind. i'll never need children when i can give birth to these things.
yes, i do still struggle with the depression, yes sometimes things bother me, but i've fouind that the buisier i am, the better i am. i may be exhausted but its still a feeling of accomplishment. i'm glad to have the jobs and education that i do because i'm surrounded by people who care about me. i don't need a man or a woman to confirm anything in my self esteem for me to feel good about myself
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